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  • Viv

Don't Do It Alone

I read a devotional this morning, the Better Mom Devotional, that emphasized the importance of nurturing our friendships. It asked me to reflect on the following question, "what is the biggest obstacle keeping me from deeper friendships right now?" It is as if the universe was conspiring to get me to pay attention to this area in my life. Even the course I'm currently taking at the Harvard business school on leadership encourages leaders to anchor themselves in support and confidants! Coincidence? I think not.

I recognize that in this busy season of my life, where I'm focused on growing my leadership, I've neglected my friendships.

As mothers, we often juggle many responsibilities, from managing a household to caring for our children's needs and growing a career. It can be easy to let our friendships fall by the wayside amid all this busyness. But nurturing our friendships is not only important for our own wellbeing, but it can also make us better mothers and leaders.

Life is meant to be lived in community. We were not created to go through life alone. Our friendships provide us with the support, encouragement, and accountability we need to thrive. When we neglect our friendships, we miss out on these important benefits. We may feel isolated, overwhelmed, and disconnected from others.

This is where the lesson of adaptive leadership comes in. Adaptive leaders prioritize self-care, recognizing that caring for ourselves is essential for us to be effective leaders. As mothers, we serve as leaders in our homes. One of the key components of self-care is anchoring ourselves with supports and confidants. These are the people who provide us with the emotional support we need to navigate life's challenges.

As mothers, we need our supports and confidants more than ever. Our friends can be a source of comfort, encouragement, and wisdom as we navigate the ups and downs of motherhood. They can help us see things from a different perspective, challenge us to grow, and provide us with a much-needed break from the demands of parenting.

So how can we make friendship a priority in our busy lives? Here are a few ideas:

  1. Schedule regular time with friends. Just as we schedule time for doctor appointments and school drop-offs, we need to schedule time for our friendships. Make time for the important people in your life, whether it's a monthly coffee date or a weekly phone call.

  2. Get creative with how you connect. With busy schedules and distance, it can be challenging to connect with friends regularly. Consider alternative ways of staying in touch, such as video calls, group texts, or even a shared journal you send back and forth.

  3. Prioritize vulnerability and authenticity. To truly benefit from our friendships, we need to be willing to be vulnerable and authentic with our friends. This means being honest about our struggles, fears, and insecurities. Allowing ourselves to be seen and known creates the space for deeper, more meaningful relationships.

Nurturing our friendships is not a luxury but a necessity for our well-being and effectiveness as mothers and leaders. Let's prioritize friendship and invest in the people who bring joy, support, and love into our lives.



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